THE DOVER CASTLE



ALPINE RATING: 8 OUT OF 10


43 WAYMOUTH MEWS, LONDON, W1G 7EH.
REGENTS PARK, GREAT PORTLAND STREET TUBE. OR CONTACT SHERLOCK HOLMES TO FIND THE VENUE. ELEMENTARY MY DEAR WATSON.......



THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THEN THE SWORD. A BRILLIANT QUOTE IF EVER THERE WAS ONE.
I THINK MORE DAMAGE HAS BEEN DONE OVER THE YEARS FROM WRITTEN WORDS THEN BATTLE ON MANY DIFFERENT PLAINS. IN FACT MUCH BATTLE HAS COMMENCED  BECAUSE OF WRITTEN  WORDS AND THIS IS A POLITICAL PATH I SHALL NOT STRAY DOWN. YOU GET THE POINT RIGHT?
I SHALL COME BACK TO THIS THEME A BIT LATER, 
YOU SEE.... IT ALL COMES TO BEAR..





THE RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS PUB HAS ALWAYS BEEN SLIGHTLY DOOMED.
LUCK HAS JUST NOT BEEN ON MY SIDE ON TWO VISITS.
THE FIRST TIME THE BATTERY DIED ON MY PHONE.
SO WHATS THE PROBLEM 'MAN IN THE BOX' I HEAR YOU SAY?
WELL.... JUST LOOK AT THE POOR RESOLUTION OF MY PHOTOS ON THIS BLOG. WHERE DO YOU THINK THEY COME FROM?
BY GEORGE I THINK HE'S GOT IT! HURRAH!
MY PHONE....
I ENJOYED A LOVELY PINT WITH MY LIFELESS PHONE AND TOOK IN THE PUBS ABSOLUTELY STUNNING INTERIOR!!




YOU SEE, IT'S THE INTERIOR THAT MAKES THIS BOOZER EVER SO SPECIAL. 'SPLENDID'.... YEP, THAT'S THE WORD THAT DESCRIBES THE ELOQUENT INSIDE.
THIS PUB IS DEFINITELY LIVED IN, THAT'S FOR SURE. 
THIS IS A PUZZLE TO ME.
 THIS PUB IS HIDDEN AWAY DOWN A MEWS. I HAD TO USE THE GOOGLE MAP TO FIND THIS PLACE. HENCE THE DEAD PHONE.
FINDING LORD LUCAN IN THE BEMUDA TRIANGLE WOULD BE A DAMN SIGHT EASIER...
IF VISITING BRING A COMPASS. IT'S SOUND ADVICE.




ENTERING THE PUB I WAS GREETED BY A VERY POLITE AMERICAN GIRL BEHIND THE BAR. SHE POURED MY DRINK WITH THE PRECISION OF A TOP SURGEON.
BEING AN AMERICAN I WOULD HAVE EXPECTED A 'HAVE A NICE DAYYY' AS I LEFT.. SHE DIDN'T THANK GOD.
TAKING IN MY PINT, I TOOK IN THE BEAUTIFUL INSIDE. THIS IS THE PUB FOR INTELLECTUAL FOLK. IT HAS BOOK SHELVES STACKED WITH OLD BOOKS SPORTING BROKEN SPINES. CRUSTY OLD BOOKS ABOUT GOD KNOWS WHAT... WRITTEN WHO KNOWS WHEN. MAYBE THEY ARE THERE JUST FOR SHOW! I CERTAINLY DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING BY JACKIE COLLINS. THE SHELVES ARE ALSO ADORNED WITH TRINKETS AND KNICK KNACKS. I THOUGHT OF ROGER MELLIE FROM VIZ WHEN HE PRESENTS THE ANTIQUES ROAD SHOW "SORRY I'M LATE. SOMEBODY IS HAVING A F**KING JUMBLE SALE OUT THERE"......
HOWEVER, THE BOOKS AND ODD BITS GIVE THE PLACE A CERTAIN AMBIANCE.
IT HAS ALL THE GOOD THINGS A SAMS PUB SHOULD HAVE.
I ALSO TOOK IN THE CONVERSATION TRANSPIRING AT THE BAR BETWEEN SOME NORTHERN CHAP IN HIS LATE 40'S AND THE YOUNG AMERICAN GIRL.
THE CHAP IN QUESTION WAS REGALING THE LADY WITH STORIES ABOUT WHEN HE LIVED IN THE AREA IN THE 1980'S.
JOKING ASIDE, IT WAS A GREAT CONVERSATION TO EARWIG.
OTHER SUBJECTS WERE DISCUSSED INCLUDING RUGBY BEING BETTER THEN FOOTBALL (CONCUR!), THE CHANGE OF MARYLEBONE OVER THE YEARS (INTERESTING, IT WAS ONCE A DUMP APPARENTLY) AND MODERN POLITICS (ALL GOOD VIEWS)... I WOULD HAVE STAYED LONGER. THE BEER WAS FAB, THE CONVERSATION TOP NOTCH. BUT I HAD TO MEET A FRIEND. SO I LEFT..
I MADE A SECOND VISIT.... OH DEAR, THE SECOND VISIT......

THE SECOND VISIT WAS DISASTROUS......
THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THEN THE SWORD...
ESPECIALLY WHEN IT DEPRIVES ME OF LAGER....




THERE WAS A NOTE WITH DODGY HANDWRITING ATTACHED TO THE DOOR. SOMETHING TO DO WITH 'MAINTANANCE' WORK.....
SO.... NO....... TADDY??..... HUH??? *QUIVERING TOP LIP*.... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

IT'S QUITE EVIDENT THAT THE COMPANY DOES NOT LIKE USING WORD PROCESSORS.

ALAS, OUR ROMANCE DOVER CASTLE, IS NOT TO BE.......
I SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU THOUGH.... WHEN I EAT DOVER SOLE, WHEN I CATCH A FERRY, WHEN I CLAMBER AROUND SCOTTISH RUINS....
WHENEVER I DIP A FEATHER INTO A POT OF INK.
YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART.
IN FACT I HAVE WRITTEN YOU A LOVE LETTER..
MWAH XXXXXXXXXXX

SEE BELOW........










NO MATTER. THIS IS A CRACKING PUB.
A LOVELY PLACE OOZING PIZAZZ AND CHARACTER. A BEAUTIFUL STONE IN AN AREA THAT PERSONIFIES THE WORD 'GROTESQUE'........






JUST A BEER LIGHT TO GUIDE US................

THE GLASSHOUSE STORES



ALPINE RATING: 8 OUT OF 10


55 BREWER STREET, LONDON, W1F 9UN.
PICCADILLY CIRCUS, OXFORD CIRCUS TUBE.




AAHHHH... THE LOST ART OF THE PUB CRAWL. BOUNCING FROM PUB TO PUB! NAUGHTY BUT NICE!!! ESPECIALLY ON A HOT DAY!
HOWEVER, THESE DAYS WITH THE RISING PRICE OF BEER AND GENERAL ATTITUDES TO US 'EVIL BEER DRINKERS', THE TRUSTY PUB CRAWL IS FADING TO A DISTANT MEMORY. AAAANYWAY........
IN THIS PART OF THE WORLD YOU  CAN HIT FOUR OF UNCLE SAMS RATHER MAGNIFICENT ALE HOUSES IN THE SPACE OF AN HOUR. THE PUBS THEMSELVES ARE ONLY A COUPLE OF MINUTES AWAY FROM EACH OTHER. THE 'DUKE OF ARGYLL' AND 'THE GLASSHOUSE STORES' ARE ACUALLY A COUPLE OF DOORS APART. YOU CAN SEE EACH ONE PERFECTLY FROM EACH SULLIED DOORWAY.
THE CRAWL I DID WAS THUS:


THE RED LION
THE JOHN SNOW
THE GLASSHOUSE STORES
THE DUKE OF ARGYLL



IF YOU WERE TO PUSH THE CRAWL, YOU COULD INCLUDE 'THE WHITE HORSE' WHICH IS ABOUT 12 MINUTES AWAY FROM THE 'THE GLASSHOUSE STORES'...
LIKE 'THE CHAMPION' I HAD TO VISIT THE PUB TWICE. THE JURY WAS OUT THE FIRST TIME. 
IT WAS A WELL THOUGHT DECISION I CONCLUDED TO. I HAD TO VISIT AGAIN AS I COULDN'T WRITE A FAIR REVIEW FOR THIS PUB.
 WHY?
GOOD QUESTION!! THE FIRST VISIT I HAD TAKEN IN ABOUT 3 OTHER UNCLE SAMS HOUSES AND DECIDED THAT MY PALETE MAY HAVE BEEN SLIGHTLY BLUNTED BY FANTASTICALLY TANGY UNCLE SAMS LAGER TO MAKE A BALANCED JUDGEMENT. THE FIRST VISIT YOU SEE WAS A RATHER ODD EXPERIENCE....


 BRAHMS?..... I COULD WELL HAVE BEEN ON THE FIRST VISIT, BUT I WAS PUZZLED ALSO. 
ON WALKING IN, I WAS GREETED BY A RETRO SKINHEAD SMOKING A FAG OUTSIDE. HE WAS A SIGHT TO BEHOLD, REAL '1968 FOREVER' STUFF. 18 HOLE DOC MARTINS, BRUTUS SHIRT AND BRACES...
HEADING TO THE BAR, I THEN CLOCKED A CHAP WITH AVIATOR GLASSES AND A HUGE QUIFF. ELVIS???!!!
WHAT THE F**K WAS GOING ON IN THIS PLACE??!!!!




NEVER THE LESS, I STARTED TO DRINK MY TADDY AND TRY TO ACT UNFAZED BY THE WAX MUSEUM SURROUNDING ME.
THE PEOPLE WERE ODD, THE PUB IS ODD. IT'S A BIZARRE L SHAPE. IT HAS A BANNISTER AT THE END OF THE PUB FOR NO APPARENT REASON!!
WHILST DRINKING MY PINT, A CHAP WANDERED INTO THE BAR WITH HIS WIFE. THEY LOOKED NORMAL. THEY WERE SPANISH TOURISTS AS IT GOES. THEY ALSO SEEMED RATHER PUZZLED BY THE PEOPLE IN THERE TOO. THEY ASKED ME WHAT WAS GOOD TO DRINK AS THEY HAD NEVER BEEN IN A SAMS BEFORE. I ADVISED. SAID GOODBYE AND HEADED OFF THE SWISS......
I THOUGHT NO MORE OF THIS GLASSHOUSE PLACE...
THE NEXT MORNING IT WAS A HAZY MEMORY..



SO I RETURNED.. IT WAS A DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE. NOT NEARLY AS STRANGE AS THE FIRST TIME.

I JUST WANT TO GET ONE CRITISISM OFF MY CHEST.
 THE BAR!!
 ITS AT THE ENTRANCE AND THATS FINE. BUT... I WISH THEY WOULD TIDY UP A BIT. IT LOOKS TERRIBLE!! PENS AND PAPER ALL OVER THE PLACE. DIRTY STICKERS ON THE WOODWORK INFORMING THE STAFF WHERE THE PENS ARE! YUK!! NASTY..... GET RID OF IT PLEEEASE!!
IF THE STAFF CAN'T DIFFERENCIATE BETWEEN PENCILS AND PENS, THEN THEY SHOULDN'T BE POURING TADDYS. SAMUEL SMITH BEER AND PUBS SHOULD BE TREATED WITH THE RESPECT THEY DESERVE!! HALFWITS SHOULD BE BARRED, NOT EMPLOYED!



THE PUB THOUGH ASIDE FROM TATTY BEHIND THE BAR STICKERS IS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD.
I LOVE THE SEATING AND COSY ENVIROMENT. THE SERVICE IS POLITE, FRIENDLY AND FAST!! VERY FAST, *JOHN WAYNE VOICE* "FASTEST DAMN TADDY IN THE WEST!... PILGRIM..."
YOU CAN SIT BY THE BAR, AS MANY DO AND CHAT TO RANDOM PATRONS. I HAVE TO SAY I THOUGHT AT ONE POINT THIS PLACE WAS THE RUNT OF THE LITTER, BUT GHEEZE, HOW WRONG I WAS!
I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY WANT TO SPEND A LAZY SATURDAY AFTERNOON HERE GORGING ON TADDY. 
THIS PUB IS WHAT US LADS SOMETIMES CALL GIRLS ' A BORDERLINE BOILER'...
IT ISN'T COSMETICALLY PLEASING, BUT SOMEHOW STILL OOOZES SEX APPEAL. THIS IS  WHAT THE GLASSHOUSE STORES IS ALL ABOUT!!
YOU JUST CAN'T PUT YOUR FINGER ON IT. SOMEHOW IT HAS CHARM, A WARM ATTRACTION....



IT REPRESENTS ALL THAT'S IMPERFECT IN SOHO. 
DIRTY, GRITTY, AND CHOKED FULL OF CHARACTER!!!!
DON'T BE FOOLED BY THE OUTSIDE! YES, 'THE DUKE OF ARGYLL' MAY LOOK BIGGER AND MORE APPEALING, BUT THIS PUB DESERVES YOUR ATTENTION.
YOUR SPOILT FOR CHOICE WHEN IT COMES TO SAM SMITH PUBS HERE, BUT MARK MY WORDS. THIS PLACE IS AN UNDISCOVERED GEM. MISS THIS AT YOUR PERIL.
WHAT A GREAT PUB. 
THIS IS ENGLAND BROTHERS AND SISTERS.
AND ENJOY IT WHILE IT'S STILL HERE. 
BEFORE THE DARK, SANITISED AND MATHEMATICAL PAPER SHAPED FUTURE FORCES US ALL TO LIVE IN THE FASCIST, BORING AND DULL LIFE ZEE FUHRER ADOLF HITLER ORIGINALLY ENVISIONED IN HIS SMALL, SICK LITTLE MIND.
IF YOU BELIEVE IN THE BRITISH PINT, PLEASE SIGN THIS ONLINE PETITION:


AND WATCH 'THE PEOPLE VS LARRY FLYNT'.

 IF YOU DON'T AGREE, THEN F**K OFF. NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR YOUR 'DEBATE'. IT'S LIKE THE BNP EXTOLLING THE VIRTUES OF ETHNIC CLEANSING, ALTHOUGH YOU MAY BELIEVE YOUR LIBERAL, YOUR CLEARLY NOT! DESTROY THE BRITISH PUB AND LEAVE 1 MILLION OUT OF WORK. FEEL SMUG NOBODY DESERVES FUN AND YOU HAVE DEPRIVED US ALL OF ANY LIBATION. THE SOLUTION TO BINGE DRINKING AND SOCIAL ILLNESS IS PUNISH US ALL BECAUSE OUR SYSTEM HAS NEITHER THE INTELLIGENCE, NOR THE BALLS TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM. 

IT'S JUST LIKE A TEACHER KEEPING THE CLASS  BACK FROM DETENTION AFTER ONE PUPILS BAD DEEDS. 
EVERYBODY MUST SUFFER!!

DO US A FAVOR, PISS OFF AND PLAY WITH THE TRAFFIC.

DON'T BE A ZOMBIE PEOPLE! 
DO YOU REALLY WANT THE WORLD OF THE FUTURE POPULATED WALKING ROBOCOPS?. NOPE, ME EITHER...............

I'M A HUMAN BEING GODDAMIT!!!
I'M A HUMAN BEING GODDAMIT!!!


IF YOU AGREE WITH ANYTHING I'VE SAID, THEN LISTEN O THIS LINK!!

SAMDMAN - REVOLUTION



IF YOU LIKED THAT LINK, DOWNLOAD THIS ALBUM:

LUCID MOVER AKA SANDMAN - CODE OF THE ROADRUNNER.

AND IT'S FREE!!!! TOP ALBUM. EVEN THE DEAD COULD SHAKE A LEG TO THIS!!



RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS ALL ACTING SATANIC....




IF YOUR STILL READING, MUCH LOVE. YOUR EVIDENTLY A TRUE BEER AFICIONADO.

OR BELIEVE IN FREEDOM. GOOD FOR YOU......

THIS IS A WICKED PUB. DON'T FEEL GUILTY FOR ENJOYING LAGER. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON. PEACE.


OH BY THE WAY... WITH REGARDS TO THE PUB......

THE SIGN OUTSIDE WAS HILARIOUS. 
IT GETS AN EXTRA POINT FOR THAT!




THE HORSE AND GROOM



ALPINE RATING: 8 OUT OF 10



128 GREAT PORTLAND STREET, LONDON, W1W 6PX.
GREAT PORTLAND STREET TUBE.






THERES A CLASSIC SCENE FROM THE FILM 'NIGHT OF THE GENERALS' WHERE PETER O'TOOLE IS SO OVERWHELMED BY A VAN GOUGH PAINTING HE STARTS TO SHAKE AND TWITCH.  
SEE FOR YOURSELF

THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TO ME STANDING OUTSIDE THIS SIMPLY WONDERFUL BOOZER. 
I WAS OVER RUN WITH EMOTION. IT'S MUSTARD YELLOW AND ORANGE TILES. 
ITS FINE DARK TINTED WINDOWS. ITS PAINTED UPPER WINDOWS OF A JOCKEY AND A HORSE. THIS IS A TRADITIONAL BOOZER. ONE LIKE THE REST, IT WILL SOON BE EXTINCT.
BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER. THIS PLACE TO ME AT LEAST, IS A WORK OF ART.





SURE, THE COLOUR SCHEME MAY BE RATHER STRANGE, BUT THE BEER INSIDE CERTAINLY ISN'T BY ANY MEANS! DON'T BE FOOLED ALSO BY THE SMALL FRONT. IT'S RATHER LARGE AND SPACIOUS INSIDE. THE PUB ITSELF IS SPLIT INTO 2 PARTS. THE BAR AREA AT THE FRONT AND A COMFY BACK ROOM WITH A JAW DROPPINGLY GOOD DARTS AREA!
IT HAS UNCLE SAM POSTERS ARRANGED ON THE WALLS IN A VERY ROCK N ROLL MANNER. THE NAME OF THIS UNCLE SAMS MAY BE RATHER DRAB, BUT THE INSIDE TELLS A DIFFERENT STORY. ITS YARDS AWAY FROM THE COCK AND THE YORKSHIRE GREY, SO IT HAS STIFF COMPETITION FROM ITS BREWERY BROTHERS. BUT I WON'T LIE, THIS BEATS THEM BOTH HANDS DOWN. THIS PLACE IS THE BEST KEPT SECRET ON GREAT PORTLAND STREET!




IT HAS THE DIM LIGHTING US UNCLE SAM FANS LOVE (SO WE CAN HIDE OUR UGLY FACES NATURALLY) AND THE OLD SCHOOL 1960s WALLPAPER, BUT WHAT TRULY MAKES THIS GAFF IS THE PEOPLE!!
I WAS SURPRISED WALKING IN HERE TO SEE THE MIX OF FOLKS. ALL WALKS OF LIFE. STUDENTS READING BOOKS AND ENJOYING A TADDY.. FAMILY'S WITH CHILDREN PLAYING HANDHELD VIDEO GAMES AND MUNCHING CRISPS, COCKNEY WIDE BOYS PLAYING DARTS "ONE HHAANDRED N AYETY GEEZAH" AND STRANGE INTELLECTUAL SPODS IN DISCUSSION ABOUT  THINGS MY PRIMITIVE LITTLE HEAD COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND..
AND THEY WERE ALL INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AS I OVERHEARD ONE OF THE THE COCKNEY WIDE BOYS ENQUIRING ABOUT A BOOK TO A STUDENT ABOUT NIETZCHE "WHATS THAT YOU READING SON? 'IM? THAT NAZI BLOKE OR SOMEFING"
THESE GUYS WERE HAVING FUN. THAT'S WHAT SHOULD BE HAPPENING IN A PUB.





I VISITED THIS PUB ON TWO SEPARATE OCCASIONS. THE FIRST TIME WAS TO PHOTOGRAPH THE OUTSIDE. I WAS WITH MY SON AND IF YOU LOOK AT THE PHOTO BELOW YOU CAN SEE OUR REFLECTION IN THE GLASS.



THE SECOND TIME WAS FOR BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY CRITICISM I DO HAVE FOR THE PLACE WAS THE SERVICE. IT COULD BEEN HAVE A LITTLE FRIENDLIER, BUT IT WAS STILL POLITE. EVEN IF I DIDN'T GET A SMILE. THE TADDY WAS ON TOP FORM (ISN'T IT ALWAYS) AND THE PLACE WAS JUMPING.



THE MIRRORS AROUND THE PLACE ARE QUITE IMPRESSIVE. IF YOUR A VAIN BUGGER THEN YOU COULD ORDER A TADDY AND ADMIRE YOUR UGLY ARSE SELF IN THE LOOKING GLASS. BASK IN YOUR OWN DARK, TWISTED REFLECTION.


OUR FAT GERMAN FRIEND CASTRATED BY THE BREWERY, THE ALPINE MAN WAS ON SHOW. I STILL LOVE TO SEE HIS BLUE LIGHT AND HAPPY BEER STEIN RAISING FACE. EVEN IF HIS TANK IS FILLED WITH SHANDY. *SIGH*


GREAT PUB AND A FANTASTIC DARTBOARD. REALLY NICE FOLK FREQUENTING THIS JOINT TOO. I WAS IN A BAD MOOD STEPPING INTO THIS PLACE AS I HAD INJURED MY ARM (I CAN'T REMEMBER IF IT WAS THE STUMP OR THE CLAW) AND I WAS HAPPY LEAVING. THAT TELLS YOU SOMETHING. WELL.... IT TELLS YOU TWO THINGS REALLY. I HAD A SOME SORT OF W***ING ACCIDENT AND THE PUB IS FANTASTIC.
CHECK IT OUT IF YOUR IN THAT NECK OF THE WOODS. WATCH OUT FOR THE COCKNEY WIDE BOYS. 
"GIMMIE A TADDY PLEEASE MAYTE"



YE OLDE CHESHIRE CHEESE



ALPINE RATING: 8 OUT OF 10



WINE OFFICE COURT, 145 FLEET STREET, LONDON, EC4A 2BU.
BLACKFRIARS AND CHANCERY LANE TUBE.


HISTORY. WHAT IS HISTORY?
IT CAN BE MANY THINGS AND YET NOTHING WHAT SO EVER. WAIT, I'LL EXPLAIN....
I ATE A MARS BAR YESTERDAY AND NOW I EXPECT ITS HALF WAY DOWN THE THEAMES. THAT'S HISTORY.
NAPOLEON WAS DEFEATED AT WATERLOO IN 1815. BOTH HISTORIC EVENTS. THE FIRST NOT MATCHING THE MAGNITUDE OF THE SECOND EXAMPLE. NEVER THE LESS, BOTH ARE HISTORY.

I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO EXPLAIN THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS PUB IN HISTORY.
HERE'S SOME BULLET POINTS:

*IT WAS BUILT IN 1538

*CHARLES DICKENS USED TO DRINK HERE. THE PUB IS MENTIONED IN THE 'TALE OF TWO CITYS'. ITS ALLEGED THAT THE INSPIRATION FOR THE BILL SYKES CHARACTER IN OLIVER TWIST CAME FROM A CHAP WHO FREQUENTED HERE.

*IT PARTIALLY SURVIVED THE GREAT FIRE OF LONDON IN LONDON IN 1666.

*DR JOHNSON LIVED NEXT DOOR (17 GOUGH SQUARE) AND MADE THIS PLACE HIS LOCAL. WHO'S DR JOHNSON? OH, NOBODY REALLY... JUST THE CHAP WHO WROTE THE FIRST EVER DICTIONARY......

*OTHER FAMOUS 'REGULERS' WERE OLIVER GOLDSMITH, MARK TWAIN, ALFRED TENNISON AND CONAN DOYLE.

* ITS MENTIONED IN THE BETTY CROCKER COOKBOOK (WHAT???)








NO REVIEW COULD EVER DO THIS PLACE JUSTICE. ITS JUST NOT POSSIBLE.
I SUPPOSE IT'S WORTH JUST EXPLAINING WHY YOU HAVE TO VISIT THIS PLACE BEFORE YOU DIE....
MANY OF YOU HAVE BEEN TO PARIS TO VISIT THE LOUVRE, RIGHT?
IT'S GOT TO BE DONE WHEN VISITING THE FINE CAPITAL OF OUR GALLIC COUSINS. NON?
YOU'VE MORE THEN LIKELY BEEN TO A GALLERY TO POUR OVER A VAN GOUGH MASTERPIECE. IT HAS TO BE DONE.
THIS PUB IS TO LAGER DRINKERS WHAT THE MECCA PILGRIMAGE IS TO THE MUSLIM BROTHERHOOD.
IF YOUR A BEER AFICIONADO AND YOU HAVEN'T BEEN HERE, HANG YOUR HEAD IN SHAME.




 FIVE MINUTES FROM THE 'CITTIE OF YORKE', THIS PUB IS LIKE TRAVELLING BACK IN TIME. THE DOOR WAY IS TINY. WALKING IN, THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IS HOW DARK IT IS. VERY DARK IN FACT. I COULDN'T TAKE ANY PHOTOS INSIDE, THAT'S WHY YOU CAN SEE ME MUGGING OFF OUTSIDE.




ITS OLDER THE THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.

IT FEELS LIKE THE PLACE IS GOING TO COLLAPSE ANY SECOND. LOW SLUNG CEILINGS TO SMASH YOUR HEAD ON (PEOPLE WERE SHORTER IN THE 15TH CENTURY, SO I'M TOLD).. A MIXTURE OF OLD BLACK OAK MIXES WITH TIRED LOOKING BRICKS. IT IS A TRUE WONDER. THE BOTTOM FLOOR IS FOR EATING AND IT WAS PACKED.
THERE ARE LOTS OF LITTLE SPACES TO HIDE IN ALSO. I FULLY EXPECTED TO SEE FAGIN COUNTING HIS ILLICIT BOOTY IN A DARK CORNER.
THE SERVICE WAS SPOT ON, EVEN MY DAD ASKING "WHATS THE STRONGEST BEER" *CRINGE* WAS ANSWERED PROFESSIONALLY AND WITH COURTESY.

THIS PLACE IS FANTASTIC. THE TOILETS ARE VERY MODERN AND THAT MADE ME LAUGH. I EXPECTED A BUCKET FULL OF HORSE MANURE TO URINATE IN TO BE FRANK.

ONE TOUCHING THING I SAW WAS A YOUNG TOURIST GIRL WITH HER FAMILY. THEY WERE AMERICAN. AS THE YOUNG GIRL WALKED IN, SHE WAS CLUTCHING A CHARLES DICKENS NOVEL (DIDN'T SEE WHICH ONE) AND SHE STOOD STILL IN AMAZEMENT TAKING IT ALL IN. HER FATHER SAID "WELL HERE WE ARE" AND SHE REPLIED "I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M ACTUALLY HERE. IN THE CHESHIRE CHEESE".... IT WAS TOUCHING TO SEE SOMEBODY TRULY AMAZED. THE FATHER THEN COMMENTED "THE BEER IS OK. I JUST WISH THEY SOLD BUDWISER". W***ER.



I SHAN'T BANG ON ANYMORE. THE TADDY IS ACE, THE STAFF WELCOMING. GET YOUR ARSE DOWN THERE PRONTO. EDVARD MUNCH'S 'THE SCREAM' SOLD FOR A WHOPPING 74 MILLION *WHISTLES*.... IT HAS BEEN DEBATED WHETHER OR NOT IT WAS WORTH THE MONEY. THE SCREAM MAY NOT BE WORTH 74 MILLION, BUT THIS PLACE IS.
SUBLIME.